The Ramblings Continue...

"Only 4% of women have the genetic ability to match the 'ideal' body type presented by the media. The other 96% often take extreme measures to obtain this unobtainable image"
I think that we're all aware of the fact that most women have unrealistic expectations about their bodies and appearance. All you have to do is take a five minute walk through Stockies and you will be confronted with society's misguided notion of beauty, and how most of us fall short. The immaculately dressed mannequins that we'd love to rip the heads off leer at us from behind their glass windows, taunting us with their blank stares that so clearly say; you're not skinny enough, not pretty enough, your hair is too messy and your clothes aren't good enough. If anyone is actually reading this, you're probably thinking that I'm exaggerating, and I know that alot of people try to trivialise the problem of female body image and say that they are petty complaints...But from the conversations that I've had with alot of girls over the past few months, this is not a minor concern. This is a very real problem that is often all-consuming, and even though it is entirely irrational, it's existence is undeniable. So, for the sake of this blog, I thought that it was necessary for me to relinquish some of my pride and share a hideously embarrassing story. When I look back it gives me quite a laugh, but I think it also helped to cement a very important lesson in not gaining or losing my self-esteem through my appearance.

This story is set around mid 2007. I woke up in the early hours of the morning and I felt.. different. My face felt a little tight, so I stumbled out of bed and made my way to the bathroom to see what the go was. Once my eyes had adjusted to the light, I realised that both of my lips had swollen to three times their normal size. Just pause and take a minute to visualise this....yes, that ridiculous picture that you are now thinking about is EXACTLY what I looked like. Really. I made Angelina Joulie look like a tight-lipped lemon-sucker. So, now mildly disturbed, I thought I should probably alert Mum. I went and woke her up, described my fat lips, and waited for some advice and encouragement. Although, as yet another boost to my rapidly deflating self-esteem, Mum couldn't bring herself to look at me for at least 5 minutes, and once she did she couldn't help letting out a horrified gasp. This was followed by quite alot of laughing and an Eddie Murphy reference, but eventually we managed to find some allergy tablets and went back to bed. When I woke up in the morning, the whole of my face from the nose down was unbelieveably itchy and now covered in one of those unbearable rashes that cause you to believe that getting a knife and slashing your face would actually be quite a relief from the itchiness. So, after numbing my face with an ice pack for over an hour, I made an appointment to go to the doctor. Now, I wasn't exactly thrilled about going out in public in my current state. My lips were swollen and the bottom half of my face was red and covered in a rash... society makes cruel assumptions about people who walk around with conditions like that. However slashing my face with a knife was quickly becoming a very real option in my mind, so I decided to swallow my pride and see a doctor. Because it was such short notice, I had to see the first doctor that was available. And, to add to the now mounting series of unfortunate events, I think it's important to note here that the doctor I saw was fresh out of med school and very good looking. Anywho, the poor guy was just as embarrassed as I was and completely stumped, so he had to call in one of the senior doctors who rattled off a list of possible causes (including wind burn if I had been out at sea..she didn't care that I told her I hadn't been near the ocean, and if I had I doubt it would make my lips swell). Long story short, they gave me some antibiotics and I later discovered that I had developed an allergy to the face powder I had been using, and subsequently vowed to never go to that GP again.

As embarrassing as this whole situation was, looking back I realised how easy it is to allow what we look like dictate what we do. I could have easily let my fear of being ridiculed for my appearance (a very real possibility in this case) prevent me from getting the help that I needed.I know that this is probably an extreme example, but I think it's still relevant to how so many women let their perceptions of their image, or other people's perceptions, or their perceptions of other people's perceptions control and manipulate their lives. But all of these can act as bondage that prevent us from being all that God wants us to be. So here's the truth, and "the truth will set you free" (John 8:32). Girls, we are beautiful! We are daughters of Christ and the handiwork of God, created in His image! Our bodies are temples of the living God! (2 Cor. 6:16-18). This is one of my favourite verses: "You knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise You because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; Your works are wonderful, I know that full well." (Pslam 139:13-14). So often our opinions of ourselves are crowded out by a list of shortcomings and flaws, but we are the FEARFULLY and WONDERFULLY made daughters of the Most High! Don't ever forget that...even when those negative voices in your head threaten to overpower you every time you look in the mirror. We are all unique, and loved in a way that we will never be able to fully comprehend. So often we try to manipulate our God-given beauty with layer upon layer of name-brand makeup (because "we're worth it") and constantly changing fashions that we're told have the power to construct the very essence of who we are. But these are all lies.
"Your beauty should not come from outward adornment, such as braided hair and the wearing of gold jewelry and fine clothes. Instead, it should be that of your inner self, the unfading beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit." (1 Peter 3:3-4).

So whether it's only using all natural mineral based face powder that is solely produced in New Zealand, or if it's indulging in your girly love of anything even remotely related to makeup, take the time to stop and consider the role that these ultimately superficial things play in the development of your self-esteem and perception of beauty. I'm not trying to turn you all into hippies, but we are beautiful without those things, and the realisation of this is something that you hold with you always.