Tuesday, October 20, 2009

Dear FB Friends

To my wonderful facebook friends,

Please refrain from sending me invitations to join you in FarmVille, FarmTown, FarmLife, HappyFarm or any other imaginary farm-related facebook application.

I do not care if you have lost a lonely black, white, pink or psychedelic
fluorescent multi-coloured polka-dotted sheep somewhere on your farm. I will not help you find it. As far as I am concerned, you are already a few sheep short of a paddock for wasting your time with such pish-posh.

I also do not care if a poor, ugly, socially-challenged duckling has run away from home and wandered onto your farm. I will not adopt the duckling. And no, sending me a picture of this glossy-eyed buck-toothed duckling will not evoke sympathy. It will probably evoke rage.

Nor will I celebrate with you when you "move up in the world of FarmVille". This probably means that you have been demoted in the real world, where we value face-to-face interactions and frown upon people who spend excessive amounts of time in imaginary worlds. There is quality medical care readily available to people with such troubling concerns.

Thank-you for understanding my request.

Kind regards, Carly.

5 comments:

Unknown said...

HAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHHAAHA

That's the funniest thing I've read in a while. And something I've also wanted to say for a long time.

As for the "quality medical care," it's less about medical treatment for these people and more about pointing, laughing, and general group-mediated humiliation.

Etienne said...

LOL,

Good thing is I haven't had one of these for a while, I'm not sure how, but I've managed to stop the onslaught.

Scott said...

Feel the palpable shame and despair at humanity's descending spiral of flaming death, as the planet keeps on riding the rollercoaster to hell.

Tarnia said...

HAHAHAHA I feel your pain Carly. I am so sick of farm ANYTHING and so over getting sent like a million gifts and request.

Oh as a hint there is a little button you can push next to the request that says "block application" it makes them all go away :-)

Leah said...

"Block application" will block the invites.

To block the notices in your newsfeed, there's this wonderful little button at the top-left of each notification which, when you hover over it, says "hide" :)